Tell me

Do you even think of me? Do you miss me? Do you remember all the things we did, or the places we went or maybe the food we ate? Do you remember the love we have.. Or maybe had. And if you have already moved on, do I get to be sad about that? Do I get to hate you for that?

I Love Surprises β€

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Until now I still can’t believe my Dad got me a dog!! Thank you Daddy!! Her name’s Casey btw. She just turned 6 months 4 days ago! Baby I’m so glad you came seriously!! I’m a lucky girl ☺😍

Cheers to the Teenage Years πŸ‘‘

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10-18-12
19th Birthday Celebration with this tiger

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This day didn’t really start the way I wanted it to. But as usual, life can surprise you. Spending the day with you.. fighting, arguing, laughing, making up, eating etc. … was just perfectly imperfect.

When I think about you before I sleep, I’d randomly recall all the good stuff. And yes, sometimes I do try to get a hold of the bad memories but surprisingly, I couldn’t. As if they’ve been somehow erased to my memory. Well, I don’t know if that’s a good thing. What I know is that.. I wouldn’t really mind sharing more good stuff with you baby.

Ignored

You know the feeling when you feel like you are talking to someone who doesn’t even see you? It sucks. I don’t really think anyone deserves to be treated that way.

Well, he is out. And as usual, I’m ignored. I only get to be recognized when a.) we just had a big fight so he feels like he needs to make up for it b.) well, I can’t think of any other things besides a so.. Never mind.

How do you learn to trust whole-heartedly if you always get or see something that makes you doubt? How do you live up with that? This is one of the main reasons why I think people need to use their minds more often than their hearts. I need not to learn the hard way.

Why do I have to feel such every time he is out with his friends? Why do girlfriends need to feel and experience such often? I have so many things to ask! Boys boys boys

Whenever you’re near

As I look into your eyes right now.. I can’t help but to feel safe. That feeling of stillness lingers in me. This is really ewwy but I think that’s the truth. It sill scares me up to now but when you asked me that question last night, I felt relieved. Not because you were worried what if, but I then felt I wasn’t worrying alone. Frankly speaking, I didn’t know how to respond. I didn’t know what to say to you. You caught me off guard. But the thing is, you did make sense. Since there is nothing permanent in this world, I can suppose that this.. What we have, can be classified under those “temporary” things. How is it gonna be? The things we do.. The places we go to.. The memories we’ve shared. How is it gonna be? Will I be okay? Will you be okay? How do I face tomorrow knowing you’re already gone? It was comforting to hear you say those questions you had/ have had ever since. Now I’m sure, you’re in this too.

Jkjdgksdg

Taxinco Midterms was.. Blah :& I’m sure as hell I won’t be passing that exam. I feel so drained. I’m calling it a night

I wanna run away

I know you might say this is so petty but.. Oh well. I just feel like there’s a need for me to let things out. He hasn’t even texted yet. And it’s cool with me. I think so (?) Whenever we fight, instead of me dealing with the ‘fight’.. I can’t help but to think whether or not you are enjoying this. Do you even think of me? Do you even think of what I am thinking? Or you are enjoying this? Well.. it is obvious that you can do the things I am not comfortable with. It sucks to be in this situation every time, yknow. It doesn’t feel good. At all.Β 

Do I tell you? That I saw those pictures? Everytime I remember that day.. it makes me weak. I feel like I’m such a weakling. I don’t know if I should, don’t know why I shouldn’t. I know past is past but.. The thing is.. You haven’t deleted those pictures. What does that imply? What do you want me to think and feel? Are you keeping them because you still love her? I have so many questions in my mind. I don’t know what to do. I know I’ve been trying to run away from it. Yeah, ever since I saw those pictures. I can’t say I wish I didn’t see ’em. Atleast I know things right. I simply don’t know how to talk to you about this.

I do hope things will be better.Β I need to be brave. Can you help me?Β